Exploring

The static sound of white noise quiets; it leaves a dark vacuum in its wake for which you were not prepared, and you spend a minute gasping for air like you had been pushing against it this entire time and now there was no foe left on the other end of the shield. A slow piano melody appears in its place, infused with so many nights of bleeding for answers, so many questions spoken into the dark, empty night. But that was ages ago now, I tell myself, and I think I made it out alive. I let the melody play as I sink into words. Pretend the reminder is harmless.

The day begins in an unknown bed, the room dark and undisturbed. I slept poorly, there was a bright blue light shining in the kitchen and for someone who sleeps so well in the middle of a busy street corner, the light's effect on me was surprising. Perhaps the light had nothing to do with it.
I see the stories I'm trying to tell; I see the forces inside me battle for power, battle for survival. But you know what's on the other side of the chaos you pursue. Aren't you tired of walking these same circles? Let it go, even if just for today, give yourself a moment's rest. Here, I'll hold your worries while you regain your strength. The rains are coming, they will wash clean the streets of our histories.

One day everything will be reduced to rubble, will be ash at our feet. I will be here still, then, standing next to you, unwavering: that is all I know. Surviving the storm is the only thing that never seemed like a fight, when I think about it.