New

Dark, cold winter night, I sat on the patio staring at the stars and speaking with the universe. A star shot across the valve; I thought, what’s the point of wishing on these stars, of picking up these pennies, what has all this wishing brought me? How heavy the heart in my chest then, how empty the quiet, dark night.

I sat a little longer, a million stars twinkling above me, more and more the longer I looked at them, and I knew. The universe had already done its part, it already brought me. It gave me a great gift even as I am small and insignificant. I have to do the rest now, I have to gather these pennies and pay them forward, the world does not owe me anything I do not already owe in return. There’s a magic in the creative life I have only barely sensed at the edges; there’s a strength in love you only reach after drowning in your fears and surviving.

January lies heavy and dark at your feet. But if you only remember to look up, there’s a Universe full of stars in your eyes.