Strung

The sunshine is relentless, lately, it beams at every turn, it wakes me in the morning and lingers into the evening. My pale winter cheeks flush, I unzip jackets and walk eyes closed down Broadway, how sweet the world can be after all this cold, after all this rejection and abandonment. I'm hesitant to believe it, like a shivering baby giraffe, unsure of the strength of my own limbs. I squint at the sunlight and test a smile, try on a deep breath for size, feel the fireworks build up in my chest but scared, so scared that it's only a ruse, that the avalanche will return and bury me again.

It took so much work just to survive. I just don't know yet if I'm ready to learn the motions,
again,
of how it is to live.