Rock Bottom

How many times I have lied crushed at the bottom of the mine shaft, thinking so this is what over feels like, and it turns out I was merely camping out on a ledge, and there were miles to tumble yet.

I sat on the stoop, slowly taking drags of a cigarette while the world swam sickenly around me. My insides wanting desperately to come out, but my limbs numb to the touch. I can pay one more month's rent, and then I will have nothing left to my name but a box of duty free tobacco and a suitcase full of books.

I feel like I have been drowning for half my life. But now, the water is beginning to boil.